"Does my teen have a pot problem?"

by Marcus Moore, MFT

Whether your teenager has just tried marijuana for the first time, or you know she’s been using for a while, worrying about your teen’s drug use can be one of the most stressful parenting issues you face. During my first conversation with parents I often hear, “…and he’s been smoking pot lately, but I’m not sure if it’s a problem.” My short answer tends to be, “If you’re calling me, a therapist, about your teen’s pot smoking, it’s likely a problem.”

As I’m sure you’re aware, many teens (but certainly not all or even most  teens) try or use pot during their high-school years. According to the 2009 Monitoring the Future Survey*, approximately 15% of 8th-graders, 30% of 10th-graders, and 43% of 12th-graders have ever used marijuana.

For some parents, trying drugs in an experimental fashion is viewed as Ok; for others it is not. It’s important that your kids know what your expectations are, and even more important that you lead by example. I have seen many parents try to tell their kids not to use drugs, only to find out from their kids that the parents themselves are frequent users. This sends a very mixed message.

In my opinion, if you are unsure about the risks of your teen’s behavior, the important question is: What are the actual changes you see in them since they tried pot?

Some things to look for are problems with thinking such as poor memory, difficulty concentrating, low motivation, and distorted perceptions. These can be present even after the immediate effects of the drug have worn off. THC, the active chemical in cannabis, affects parts of the brain that control these functions. If you see that your teen has changed in any of these areas, then drug use may be a culprit.

If your answer is, “I’m not sure if she’s changed because I never see her anymore, and she won’t talk to me when she gets home,” then you have a major red flag. If she is still basically the same kid she has always been (allowing for a bit of moodiness and typical teen drama), her grades and social functioning are consistent, and she appears emotionally and physically healthy, then the fact that she tried marijuana may not be a major problem in and of itself. However, it is still risky and could easily worsen or land her in legal trouble.

Talking to your child about drugs is still important, regardless of whether or not you observe negative effects. You can also seek help from a therapist or other qualified professional. Approach the conversation with your teen with a non-judgmental attitude, but be sure to communicate that pot use is no joke, and it carries legal as well as physical consequences.

Your teen may accuse you of “freaking out just because I tried pot!”, but remember that talking to her or talking to a counselor are not “freaking out”; you are making responsible choices and voicing concerns. Screaming accusations, shaming, or resorting to violence are “freaking out” and are not ok.

Resources

Here are some further resources you may find helpful. They include information on teen drug use, marijuana, and tips on talking to your child about tough topics. Feel free to call me if you want to have a conversation with or about your teen.

·      NIDA- Marijuana Overall http://www.drugabuse.gov/drugs-abuse/marijuana
·      “Facts for Teens.” Brief, easy to understand page with general info on marijuana for teens: http://www.drugabuse.gov/publications/marijuana-facts-teens/want-to-know-more%E2%80%94-some-faqs-about-marijuana
·      SAMHSA- Marijuana Publications http://store.samhsa.gov/facet/Substances/term/Marijuana
·      Uriah Guilford (Santa Rosa MFT). Talking to Your Teen: http://helpthiskid.com/2011/11/30/sex-drugs-rock-n-roll-and-your-teenager/

*The Monitoring the Future Survey is funded by the National Institute on Drug Abuse, National Institutes of Health, and Department of Health and Human Services. It is conducted annually by the University of Michigan’s Institute for Social Research. The survey has tracks 8th, 10th, 12th grader’s illicit drug use and related attitudes.

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